How do you uncover suppressed memories of experiences?

Okay, so I've strongly suspected for the past few years that I've been an abductee throughout my life, mostly in early childhood, then through adolescence until maybe mid-20s. Thing is, I have major chuldhood trauma that I can't largely put my finger on, except for a few significant events, which were horrible enough. I was proficient at dissociating as a coping mechanism, and a blockade was in place in my mind that protected me from experiencing the trauma of my early life. However, a few years ago (I'm 48 now), I experienced my first flashback episode of abuse that snowballed into regular non-epileptic pychogenic seizures. I had a couple years of therapy and am now mentally well again, but have never recovered more memories. There are just years of blackness in my past. Something deep inside resonates with me concerning the alien abduction phenomenon. I am a person that dreams extremely vividly and fantastically every single night. I've had dreams of looking out my childhood window at night at the sky and being scared. I remember entities in my room that I was terrified of. I was baptized and given a Bible at 8. After reading that, I started believing they were demonic and would cast them out of my room by the name of Jesus. Things seemed better for awhile after that. But, I would experience sleep paralysis off and on until shortly after I got married at 25, then that seemed to stop. The last few years have made me very curious about my past experiences. Then, I had a "dream" a few months ago where the Grey's came for me again. I made the conscious decision not to rebuke them in Jesus' name because I was so curious and wanted to see what would happen. I was taken to their ship, from out my window. There were at least 2 beautiful women looking humanoids. One had extremely red hair. She was so curious about me and seemed to be there to observe, but she didn't seem quite human. Everything was pretty fuzzy for me, I think it was sheer will power that was keeping me conscious. Then, this doctor type one, noticed I was aware and said "she's awake!" He came at me with some kid of syringe and then I was back out. It was weird, because it seemed like I was floating somehow, like in some kind of gaseous state, almost liquid, but not quite. I became aware again as I was getting ready to be sent back and I asked (maybe telepathically?), "what do you want with me?" Oddly enough, the redhead replied, "you are our hope!" Then, I was floating back towards my window and I heard the girly ones saying, "goodbye, Hope!", almost in a giggly way, like they made a joke. (My name is NOT Hope). My husband is convinced it was just a dream, he is the opposite of me and very closed minded. I'm leaning towards an actual experience. I do know that, if it happens again, more rebuking will be happening! My question, though, is: have any of you had a similar past/childhood, full of years of, just back, and then been able to recover these type of events? If so, how did you do it? Do you have any helpful websites or book recommendations?