Stop telling me my body will make what baby needs.

Just stop. Please. Maybe it's true for you but it isn't for everyone.

I had severe postpartum preeclampsia that happened right as my milk came in. I was hospitalized 9/12-15. It is now 2/12. I have spent all of these months trying to nurse, pumping round the clock. Getting with lactation specialists and being given the right flange sizes. I've tried manual and electric pumps of all kinds. I have used a shield and went without one too. Today was my first time trying to use an sns and I just broke down in tears. My son attempted for a minute to do it but I couldn't get a good flow through the tube of milk/formula. It was leaking all over the bedding. He got frustrated.

Every fucking day I pump and you know how much I get? At first it was 2 ounces TOTAL combined. I thought that was bad. But I kept trying. Now we were at 1 ounce. Make that make sense. And now it's 0.5 ounces even though I pump throughout the day and night. The flanges are right. The membranes have been replaced. My body just doesn't give a shit. You want more milk? Yeah, right! None for you.

My baby is happy on formula or milk. I understand this. I have two other children that were formula fed. But I've tried so damn hard this time and for what? For people to tell me if you just pump, if you just nurse, the milk will be there! You just don't try hard enough! Your body will figure it out!

No. It fucking hasn't and it never will.