How to heal lips after 2 decades of peeling and picking

I'm in my mid 30s. In middle school I read an article about "exfoliating your lips", and that's when it all started. I now have been peeling/rubbing the skin off my lips pretty much every day for like 20+ years. Sometimes I get too aggressive with it and I get raw bleeding lips. I think because I've caused them so much trauma they almost over grow the skin on them now? Like once I've rubbed them smooth, either later in the day or the next day they will have dry rough patches of skin on them- that I then again pick off :( How can I heal this and get smooth lips without having to "exfoliate" them? I currently use eco lips bee free lip balm, Vaseline, and Aquapor lip balm.