Imagine Being a Boss/Manager in the True Blood Universe

Imagine all of the call ins/no call no shows you would experience weekly, if not daily.

Sorry boss. I can't come in today. I am trapped in a witch emporium and she spelled the doors so I can't get out.

Sorry I missed work last week. I was kidnapped by a catatonic a vampire and chained to a bed.

I didn't mean to no call no show. I accidentally walked through a portal and entered a fairy realm. And time works differently there so I didn't realize how long I'd been gone.

Hey boss. I'm not feeling to well. I'm a skin walker and when I shift into other people I run a really high fever and puke blood uncontrollably.