How to tell if you have orgasmed?

I had sex recently and he gave me such good head and my clitoris was very sensitive for quite a time already and i noticed i feel that way after i already came in masturbation. But i think i didn’t orgasm when he was giving me head because i didnt feel any spasms down there. Am i right?

And another time i was on top and i think i was about to come because i felt like peeing? It was such a weird feeling i couldnt continue because i was scared i might actually pee! How do i help my partner get me to climax?